Mountain View Mommy: Sand, Trucks and Testosterone

November 15, 2007

Now that’s dedication

Filed under: Stories — by mvmommy @ 8:24 am

When I met my husband, I soon learned of his addiction.

It’s ice cream.

However, I am not sure that I would classify it as an addiction. It’s more a super-power of some sorts. He can consume large volumes of ice cream faster than any human alive. Yet he manages not to get a headache from the cold. AND, his mouth never gets too cold … thus, he is never forced to take breaks from the huge-single-scoop-like-proportions that he calls ‘a spoonful’.

In the early days of our dating, I learned of his ice cream fetish when his roommate would complain that every bowl in the apartment was always dirty because Nathan had ice cream every night. (Let’s not go into why they didn’t just wash them everyday.) And then later, his mother bought him bowls specifically FOR ice cream. And upon further inspection, I noticed that there was never a lack of options in the freezer. There were always ‘choices’ for your ice cream dessert; none were stale, and all were used quickly so that new choices could be brought in.

Impressive I thought to myself: a man who loves his dessert like I do.

In the early days of our marriage I tried to keep up. We would eat out of the carton while watching a show, and for every 2 spoonfuls he got – I could barely scarf down one. And I was trying. Trying HARD. I don’t like to be weaseled out of my fair share of a dessert. I am competitive that way.

So I tried to swallow the large portions, that he called spoonfuls, quickly. They were so huge they would make my mouth cold. And in the time that he shoveled another one down, and was offering me a 2nd, I was still trying to frantically swallow so I could ‘keep up’. In the end we had to agree that he would slow down, because I was watching him & counting. And there was NO WAY he was going to finish that carton by himself just because of his super-human-ice-cream-eating-mouth.

Frankly, I thought no one could rival this obsession.

Until Justin was born.

Justin can put away ice cream faster than we can dish it out. Honestly, if you make the mistake and serve him first… and continue to scoop ice cream for the next person… you have made a fatal flaw. He will be done before you bring the next bowl to the table. And he will be demanding more, and won’t give in until his needs are met. At two years old, he is definitely his father’s son.

But today….

Today he outdid his dad.

He ate his ice cream in record speed. While I savored my first spoonful, he was tilting the bowl to get the little drips that had melted before he could eat them. After successfully wiping it clean, he got up to clear his bowl. He walked to the kitchen, and stopped mid-step. He just stood there, staring at his bowl in horror.

Then he turned around and high-tailed it back to his seat. Threw the bowl on the table, jumped in the chair, and declared….


Sure enough. He had missed a quarter of a nut speck that was left over from the Rocky Road he had consumed. And there was no way that little morsel was going to live to tell the tale.

He scraped it out, swallowed it, and got back to clearing his bowl – clearly proud of the work he had done.

I think Nathan has some serious competition. I can just picture them 10 years from now, having an ice-cream-a-thon. You think I am kidding… but you are sadly mistaken. That day will come. Guaranteed. And when they are sick to their bellies from the gallon they consumed in 5 minutes, I will be finishing my first scoop slow and steady, going back for a little more ….. if there is anything left.


1 Comment »

  1. And I suppose your husband doesn’t gain weight either? So not fair. My husband and his brother used to split a half gallon after dinner when they were teens.

    Comment by Mary Alice — November 16, 2007 @ 5:06 pm |Reply

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